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Wedding Traditions: Age

This is less about a tradition and more about a social issue. However, only until recently did anyone think twice about a couple marrying when the man is far older than the woman. At any rate, there are only 13 years between us; there have been a few people who have raised eyebrows at this... but it isn't like one of us is 90 and the other 15!

Age disparity has never been much of a subject until recent times. Throughout history, it has been customary for older men to take much younger wives. Even older female monarchs have historically taken much younger regents. Somehow, modern society has changed to the point that people are programmed to do a double-take when they hear of an age difference.

In ancient Greece, Aristotle himself declared that the idea age for marriage is when the groom is 37 years old and the bride is 18. That's 19 years of difference... and, curiously, the exact ages of Aristotle and Pythias when they were married. It sounds less like Aristotle's sagely wisdom and more like his justification for the union!

13 years isn't much. It would seem like a lot if David were 23 and Elaine were 10... yet seems less noticeable as the ages increase. If David were 65 and Elaine 52, nobody would give it a second thought. Elaine isn't "gold-digging" because David isn't rich (although we both plan to be someday); it isn't a "May-December romance" because David isn't that old (although he often feels like it); and David isn't "robbing the cradle" because Elaine isn't that young (although he teases her as if she is).

Ultimately, we ask nobody to give it a second thought... because we certainly don't. Love is blind to things that don't matter, and our ages don't.

 

 
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